Saying No to the Master’a Degree, Part One

Is earning a master’s degree the right thing for me?

From the time I started working at Southeastern (February 2006), the university has required employees to be available for calls during the Christmas break. I have always volunteered for that time because it was no inconvenience for me. We have our home business and we home schooled, so I was never trying to match up with a school break schedule for my children. We could do as we pleased. It was easy for me to switch out the days and take time off earlier in the month of December. I didn’t have do work on the actual days for the holidays, but I worked the extras, in between, which usually amounted to four days. In 2010, I had a total of three calls. This year, the new administration agreed with our office that it was not necessary to staff our office for that time. For the first time in my Southeastern career, I enjoyed ten and half days in a row—half of December 23, plus two weekends and on through January 2. I got a lot of work done around the house, and I enjoyed time with my husband and my children, including a little shopping and a movie or two. Still my thoughts during that time were that I would soon be starting on my master’s. I had enrolled for classes and bought my books. I was trying to accomplish as much as I could in preparation for hours of schoolwork each week.

This past week, ending today, has been Week 0. The classes, which are online, are set up with this early week, where classmates introduce themselves online, look over the textbook and syllabus, and get started on planning the work for the eight weeks of study, Weeks 1—8. Each class is “opened” for the students on Blackboard, where class discussions take place and where we submit our work. As of last Wednesday, January 4, my course was still not showing up. When another student, who is also my graduate admission counselor, asked if I had started my Week 0 work, I responded that it was not yet available to me. His course had opened, he said, and he suggested I check with the online office. They were able to fix my student status immediately and make things accessible to me. I printed out my Course Chart, Syllabus, and Course Policies and looked them over. I looked through the textbook. I felt uncomfortable. I saw that I was not interested in knowing about learning theories and how children hold their pencils and draw and write as they develop. I wondered what the master’s would provide for me in the end. Why was I doing this? Just because of the waiver? Was it God’s leading for me? Would I be better off to give the time to my family? Down inside, it suddenly felt completely wrong. I was spending time (and money, for books) to pursue a goal that I wasn’t sure would benefit me in the end. It would also eat up two more years—two important years that needed to be given to my family, home, and other pursuits for income.

For the next twenty-four hours, I thought about the past two and half years of schooling for my bachelor’s degree. I thought about the week off I enjoyed for Christmas break, the first Christmas break I had enjoyed since I started working at Southeastern. I had never even taken more than three days in a row for vacation. I considered that I was committing to two years for the work, which meant I would still be neglecting work that I should be doing at home and for our business. I had not caught up over break, and I realized that I would not be able to catch up while in school, much less move ahead. As an employee, my tuition is waived, and it seemed that it was a reason God had placed me at SEU.

But maybe not; maybe it was for the waiver for my children and myself for undergraduate classes. It does not have to include graduate school. Throughout the day, I became more and more unsettled. I had mentioned the idea to my daughter—just as a possibility, just as something to pray about. Even as I walked through the house on Thursday morning, the idea of not being in school made me feel like a different person. It was a feeling of release. I looked at my home office and saw how much tidier it was after the time off. I saw the items I had prepared for a garage sale and to sell on eBay. I considered that, during the past week, I had sold several things on eBay and VegSource. I was making progress. It felt so good!

And so . . . when I got to the office on Thursday, I was fully heading in that direction. I was thinking I would withdraw, but I decided to allow myself the option to further examine the issue by only postponing the start. By noon, I had officially deferred the start of my master’s to summer. I returned my books and got the refund of more than $200. Yes! Almost reason enough just for the money. I will further examine the reasons to pursue a master’s. I will set out the pros and cons and be completely clear about the idea.

And I will continue schooling only if I understand the reason to do it.

Besides, I’m also taking Spanish!