Do What I Should Be Doing

It’s been two weeks without classes (besides the delightful Spanish I am continuing). I am giving slightly more attention to an area that has been neglected: Me. In addition to Bible reading, blogging, catching up with the home business, taking care of home, and spending more time with my husband and children, I am starting to think about myself a little bit. Student used to be the primary way I described myself. For two years, until I graduated in December 2011, I was a full-time student (most semesters) while working full-time and in our home business. Now that school is finished and I have deferred the graduate work, I have to see what is next. I need to know if completing the master’s is the right direction for me. Self-examination and research about the value of the master’s will be necessary.

From a file of some quiet time notes, I had a short reminder to do my best in the roles to which I have been called. During the years I was home schooling while working in our home business, I was heavily involved in home-schooling activities learning about the process as I went. The business struggled at times, and I had some questions about how to manage home, business, school, and family. I wanted to figure it all out. As the children went into their teens, my “job description” continued to evolve. During one quest of self-examination, I realized that I needed to focus on what I had been called to do for that time in my life, but it wasn’t about doing everything perfectly. And the concept still applies to today: Do right now what I have been called to do and do everything to the best of my ability. God won’t do for me what I am able to and supposed to do. But He surely will do what I cannot do and He will stand with me as I do the part to which He has called me. Everything I wanted to do well at when I was at home for those eighteen years still holds true: to be the best wife, the best mother, the best teacher for my children, the best business partner, the best homemaker.

 

Whether my children knew it or not, I was perfectly selected to be their mother. And along with that came/comes some mistakes. As my children grow older, new questions have come up. I see new areas in which I can develop my example and help them to become stronger. It is easy to apply the concept of excellence to my responsibilities as a student, now graduated but continuing with Spanish. Most certainly it applies to my employment at Southeastern University. Ahhhhhhhh, but I struggle more to grasp that it also applies to what one might call personal issues. Maybe it’s called personal growth. I have some areas to work on, some rebellion to knock down. I want them to see a positive change in me. I want to set some new goals and achieve them. I want to experience a change in behavior that gives visible results. Goals can be met! Changes can take place! Hope always!